Unconfirmed Breaking News
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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

LONG JOHN SILVERS SEAFOOD THOMSON GEORGIA Washington Road I-20, Long John Silvers Fast Sea Food Restaurant McDuffie County GA.

BREAKING NEWS – Louisville, Kentucky – Long John Silver’s is under fire from Green Peace, PETA, and NOW, after being accused of causing the death of hundreds of mermaids every year. The CEO of the seafood restaurant franchise Mike Kern, responded by saying that all of the mermaids were prostitutes that were repeatedly warned not to swim so close to the nets, as they were trying to get the attention of the fishermen on the ships. He said he can prove it by submitting hundreds of business cards that were tossed to the fishermen, with names of deep sea escort services.

Long John Silver'sNOWPETA

• 11/28/2013


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