Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

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By my own admission, I know very little about how the human body works, which is the reason I recently went to the doctor to find out why I haven’t been feeling well lately. After running some tests, I was startled to find out that that I need to have a hysterectomy, whatever that is. The doctor then got really agitated when I told him that I would probably seek a second opinion, calling me “disrespectful and insulting”. He continued scolding me, and then he pridefully told me in a stern voice that he hadn’t had a single complaint lodged against him since the beginning of the current investigation he’s under for medical insurance fraud allegations. I’m scheduled for the surgery next week. Hopefully it’s outpatient because I’d rather not stay overnight.

Life through Blake's eyes

• 03/30/2014


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