Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

I bought a refrigerator last week, that I’m now taking back. When I opened the door, I noticed that it had “tempered” glass. The word “temper” suggests to me, hostility and anger. Further proof that my assessment and suspicion were correct, came after I put some peas in the refrigerator, and when I took them out later, they all had black eyes. I hate violence.

Life through Blake's eyes

• 08/30/2015


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