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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Sidney, Australia – There’s a new type of motorcycle helmet that you clip on instead of slip on that will be available in January for $650. The Vozz RS 1.0 is split in two and hinged at the top. Rather than sliding it over your head and securing it with a chin strap, it closes around your noggin like a clamshell, supporting your chin in an adjustable cup. Its Australian inventors say the design gives it a better fit, and creates a smaller opening at the bottom, which helps keep out the air and reduce lift and wind noise. Also, for motorcycle riders that are intoxicated, due to its air tight fit, if the ever throw up, the vomit remains in the helmet and does not ruin expensive paint jobs or chrome. And under those alcohol influenced conditions, the helmet can be easily removed later by the arresting officer, ER staff, or the local coroner. Remember if you ever find yourself in a crash to make sure you take the necessary procedures such as employing the assistance of a personal injury lawyer, you can learn more here if you wish.

• December 24, 2015


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