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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – North Pole, Alaska – This Christmas Day, parents worldwide had to take their children to Emergency Room due to a practical joke by Santa Claus. After delivering their gifts, he put two very large speakers in each child’s bedroom. And using a remote control he blasted the phrase “Merry Christmas”, with a decibel level five times louder than a 747 taking off. Santa responded to the millions of complaints by saying, “Only a very small percentage of the kids will be startled enough to have a mild heart attack. But most of them will only have their ear drums permanently being damaged, which is unfortunate because they won’t be able to hear people laughing at by far one of my best pranks!”

ChristmasSanta Claus

• December 25, 2015


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