Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

I rarely go to restaurants with anyone, because my eating habits embarrasses whomever I’m dining with. I usually consume all of the food on my plate in less than 60 seconds, and my gorging always garnishes strange looks from anyone that happens to be looking my way. Last week when I was having lunch alone in a restaurant, a cop that was sitting at a table across from mine, actually put me on radar. In his opinion, I was eating so fast, that he gave me a meal ticket. What the…

Life through Blake's eyes

• 06/26/2016


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