Unconfirmed Breaking News
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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – The ACLU is currently lobbying to get a law passed in Congress, which would mandate homeowners that moved out of their previous residence that they are trying to sell, to leave a functional landline with an active phone in the vacant house. They explained that this “common sense idea would give ‘911’ access to penniless squatters in case of an emergency, after they broke into the dwelling.”

ACLU

• 07/27/2016


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