Unconfirmed Breaking News
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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – In an attempt to show she is tough on terrorism, Hillary Clinton has vowed if elected, she will ban the sale and distribution of pressure cookers in the United States because they have been used to make bombs. And to show she has zero tolerance for violence, she also promises to reduce child abuse from young parents that condone corporal punishment, by mandating extensive background checks done on anyone trying to purchase a wooden spoon.

Hillary Clinton

• 09/30/2016


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