Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

I dreamed I had bought an entire floor of the Empire State Building and I owned a glue manufacturer. At one point, I tripped while carrying a couple of buckets of glue and I fell out of the window. Fortunately in my dream, the glue actually secured me to the wall right outside the window, and I was suspended there. I used my cell phone to called 911, and I told them that the 7th floor was my story… and I was sticking to it.

Life through Blake's eyes

• 01/29/2017


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