Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

My nephew recently went on trial for attempting to rob a bank. The prosecution stated during the proceedings that they found his DNA at the crime scene, emphasizing that the chances of someone else having his, was 1 in 15 billion. When my nephew testified, he said because there are only 7.5 billion people on earth, he argued that the real culprit has probably already left the planet, and the police should be trying to arrest him before he leaves the solar system. Hmm, interesting. #newstandardinidicocy

Life through Blake's eyes

• 03/12/2017


Previous Post

Next Post

Leave a Reply

Or