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Blake’s Advice Column

Dear Blake,

What’s the best way to deal with another toddler who gets physically rough with my 1-year-old daughter? I have two examples. The first: A little boy, about 2, ran up behind her at a park and pushed her over. She was not even looking at him when it happened. The second one was more troubling. She was at a playground with our family, and a little boy about 3 or so ran up to her and grabbed her nose, rather hard, and scratched up her face in the process. What should I have done? I told the kid that that was not nice, and he ran away. My husband made me promise to not walk over to the kid’s parent and complain. I was so angry. This never happened with her older brother. I feel like the deck is already stacked against her just because she is a girl. I was told you often have some very innovative ideas in regards to solving problems. Please help!!!

Signed, Lydia

From Cheyenne, Wyoming

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Dear Lydia,

I am sorry to hear that your young daughter has been subjected to this type of treatment. The best way to deal with this problem, is for your daughter to get even more aggressive with those little punks. Teach your daughter how to pretend to stumble as she walks toward those little devils, so it appears that it was an accident as she “trips” and knocks out all of their front baby teeth. Accuse those delinquents of saying something inappropriate to your daughter, and try to get them registered as sex offenders before they start preschool. You should also seriously consider conducting a preemptive strike in the public interest the next time your daughter is attacked. This can be done by teaching your little girl to kick one of those out of control brats in a certain place hard enough to insure that little kid won’t ever have any little kids, thus genetically ending the vicious cycle. And finally, as your daughter gets older, living in Wyoming can be used to her advantage. By the time she’s a teenager she will know how to lasso. And when any hooligan with overactive hormones crosses a line, she can rope them and brand them with a hot iron. And for her not to worry, because third degree burns on a groin will eventually heel… I think. I hope this helps.

Blake

Blake's Advice Column

• 04/08/2017


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