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Blake’s Advice Column

Dear Blake,

I have been divorced for eight years and have a wonderful, kindhearted 13-year-old son. My ex-husband is supposed to pay some form of child support, but has never given me a dime. He refuses because of my income, and he hides his money in his business. I have come to accept his selfishness, but a month ago he “borrowed” $130 from my son’s piggy bank — hard-earned money his relatives gave him for doing chores, getting good grades and birthday gifts. My son has asked his father to return the money, but it has been more than a month and his dad keeps making excuses. Now he is devastated that his dad took his money. What advice can I give my son on how to get his money back, or is it gone forever?

Signed, Lisa

From Richmond, Virginia

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Dear Lisa,

It’s unfortunate your son was subjected to such a deplorable example that your ex-husband has set. But there are plenty of vindictive things your son can do, that’ll make his father wish there was a mix up in the nursery the day your child was born. Consider some of these ideas. Have your son place posters all over town, of a picture of your ex-husband alleging that he is wanted for theft. And if possible, send a few copies to his business associates. Have your son fill his piggy bank with coins, and then drop it on his father’s head from a second floor, including a note inside that says he qualifies for another loan. (More than likely, upon impact, the bank and his head should crack open). The next time your ex comes by for a visit, remove the tires from his car and sell them to a local pawn shop. If you get more than $130, give it to your son and tell him that was the interest. However, the worst case scenario would be that money is gone forever. So what your son should do, is to safeguard his money in his piggy bank for the future, by rigging something up to it that will deter your ex-husband from ripping him off again. To get ideas, have your son read the biography of the Unabomber. I hope this helps.

Blake

Blake's Advice Column

• 09/16/2017


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