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Blake’s Advice Column

Dear Blake,

My husband and I enjoy drinking wine. Because of our busy schedule, we often stock up when there is a sale for the sake of convenience. I cannot tell you how many times the cashier at the grocery or discount store will comment, “Are you having a party?” or “Boy, you sure do drink a lot of wine.” As a customer, I find this both rude and embarrassing. Do you have any advice on how to respond to let her know that I find this to be poor customer service?

Signed, Cynthia

From Chicago, Illinois

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Dear Cynthia,

It is entirely possible that the cashier is just trying to have a friendly conversation while doing her job. It’s also possible that the she likes poking fun at people that appear to be potential town drunks. But if you really want to rattle the “rude” employee, here are some suggestions. The next time the question is asked, emphatically state that you will be using the booze to spike the punch at your 8 year old’s birthday party. Or, you can allege that driving is so stressful, you always have at least ten glasses of hard liquor, before you feel relaxed and comfortable enough to get behind the wheel. Try this one. Tell her you are buying the spirits, to celebrate with several other people you went to class with, that successfully completed a course at Alcoholics Anonymous. But if you really want to make a point, after the awkward question is asked, grab one of the bottles, and send it crashing down on top of the cashier’s head. And as she wobbles feeling dazed and disoriented, ask her what goes best with skull fractures, red or white wine? I hope this helps.

Blake

Blake's Advice Column

• 10/01/2017


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