Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Bristol, Connecticut – Jemele Hill, an ESPN anchor who called for fans to boycott the NFL, has been suspended for two weeks by the network. Hill, who called President Trump a “white supremacist” on Twitter last month violated the company’s social media guidelines for a second time by calling on fans to take indirect action against the Dallas Cowboys after owner Jerry Jones told players they would be benched if they didn’t stand up during the national anthem. At first Hill denied even being at work that day, and alleged what people saw on tv was a computer generated image of her, created jointly by some of the closet KKK members at ESPN and some some racist Hollywood special effects technicians. She later admitted that it was her, but said her words were misunderstood. “I never called for a boycott,” she explained. “I said Jerry Jones barber gave him a ‘boy cut’, because I felt he should have an adult hairstyle. So, if ESPN fires me, I’ll sue.”

Donald TrumpESPNJemele HillNFL

• 10/10/2017


Previous Post

Next Post

Leave a Reply

Or