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Blake’s Advice Column

Dear Blake,

My wife and I have been married 41 years. We live outside of Chicago, where the winters can be bad. My son and his family moved to Florida to get away from the weather here. Now my wife wants to move there, too. I have medical issues and don’t like hot, humid weather. She says she’s going, and I told her I’m staying here. Should I go with her or should she stay here with me?

Signed, Dan

From Chicago, Illinois

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Dear Dan,

Obviously, the dilemma is the climate. I can think of a dozen reasons to move out of Chicago, and none of them have anything to do with the weather. Let’s look at it from several angles. In Chicago, you’ll freeze in the winter, but on the upside, gang members usually remain indoors when it gets really cold. In Florida you won’t freeze, but the mosquitoes always welcome new additions to their buffets. Because you have be married for 41 years, separation will do both of you some good, because more than likely, the two of you are sick of each other. It’s possible that when the temperatures reach 40 below zero (with the wind chill factor) in Chicago during the winter, you’ll book a flight out of that frozen wasteland heading for Florida. And it’s also possible that your wife will book a flight back to Illinois, after those flying “Dracula” insects depletes her of a couple pints of blood. However, marriage is about compromising. Why don’t both of you move to California. It’s not humid there and it never gets cold. The only issues you have to deal with, is the ridiculously overpriced real estate, the misguided politicians that have destroyed the Golden State, and the irritating way their stupid teenagers talk. I hope this helps.

Blake

Blake's Advice Column

• 06/03/2018


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