Unconfirmed Breaking News
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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Yellowstone National Park – An unidentified man was seen in a viral video attempting to wash his feet on the Yellowstone National Park’s geyser basins– a section of the park where people have been boiled alive. “Just as my family and I arrived at the thermal pool, we see this guy cross over the barricades and head straight for the water,” the woman who recorded the video told the paper. “Everyone around us was yelling for him to get out and to be careful. He did not look up and make eye contact with anyone. At one point, he took his shoes and socks off and attempted to put his feet in the water.” Park rangers and the police are now questioning a family of cannibals in the area, that have been accused of drugging people, and encouraging them to jump into the boiling water, because it’s their version of homemade soup.

• September 25, 2018


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