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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Tokyo, Japan – Sick of backpacks that can’t hold every belonging you’ve owned in the last decade? A Japanese apparel company has you covered. The Backpacker’s Closet, a new item from a manufacturer called CWF, is allegedly “all the rage” in Japan and appears large enough to carry another entire human being, Elle reports. The nylon bags, are advertised as measuring 68 centimeters (26.7 inches) wide by 27 centimeters (10.6 inches) deep, and having a length of 100 centimeters (39.3 inches). CWF said they believe the new backpack will be very popular in the U.S. with college students, business people that carry a lot of documents, and serial killers who want to dispose of a body while avoiding suspicion.

• January 4, 2019


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