Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

I almost went to jail yesterday morning. I usually walk 2.5 miles to start my day, but yesterday I decided to try 7 miles. I was so exhausted that my feet and legs were sore, and it hurt every time I took a step. A policeman approached me, and after I spoke to him, he told me to sit down for a little while to regain some of my energy. I thanked him for his suggestion, and I told him that I was going to continue on home. He then threatened to put me in handcuffs, and was going to charge me with “resisting a rest”. What the…

Life through Blake's eyes

• January 27, 2019


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