Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

I had the weirdest dream the other night. I dreamt that I was riding on an elephant with a couple of my friends in India. I was sitting in the front, and I was using the elephant’s nose for a steering wheel. I have never had a DUI in my life, but the police stopped us, and charged me with trunk driving. What the…

• February 2, 2019


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