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Blake’s Advice Column

Dear Blake,

I have been happily married for more than 40 years. Since he retired a couple of years ago, it has come to my attention that he has been getting mail at a separate private mailbox. I don’t see a good reason for this, and it is weighing on me heavily. Because I don’t see anything he buys or pays for, I remain in the dark. It’s not that he isn’t generous; I lack for nothing. It’s that he is secretive. If I confront him, I’m not confident he would give me all the information. At this stage in my marriage, have you any advice for me?

Signed, Kimberly
From Jacksonville, Florida

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Dear Kimberly,

What he is hiding is currently a mystery. My guess is it’s something awful, thus I would advise you to join a local emotional support group, so you will already be prepared when the truth finally comes out about the lying treacherous man you foolishly married that will soon plunge you into a deep depression. Here are some possible motives for his covert mailbox. He could have another family that you know nothing about, and he doesn’t want you contact his other wife and upset her and their kids. It could be he has ties to some terrorists, so try to find out from the Post Office if any letters or packages sent to him, has return addresses with Syrian zip codes. He might even be receiving drug shipments, and to test that theory, see how he reacts if you say you want to spend your next vacation near the southern border. But on the other hand, he may not be having anything placed in his P.O. Box that can be construed as illegal. My guess is, he’s probably taking out several life insurance policies on you that he doesn’t want you to know about, and that’s not against the law. And because he has been married to you for 40 years, which shows that he loves you and would not want you subjected to any long term discomfort, it’s highly likely that he will insure that your “expiration” is quick and painless. I hope this helps.

Blake

Blake's Advice Column

• May 11, 2019


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