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Blake’s Advice Column

Dear Blake,

I have a friend who calls 20 times a day. If one of my kids asks me something and I ask her to hang on while I respond, she hangs up on me. We have had a falling-out over this more than once. I think it’s rude of her to just hang up. I feel it would be different if she called only a few times a week for a few minutes, but that’s not the case. She feels I am being rude to ask her to hang on, and that my kids should either wait until we are finished or go on about their business and come back to talk to me later. However, they can’t always do that. They try really hard not to interrupt, but sometimes they just have to because of time. Am I wrong to be upset?

Signed, Olivia
From Albuquerque, New Mexico

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Dear Olivia,

What your friend doing is very rude. The only thing I can suggest to you, is to put that selfish insensitive moron in a position where she is almost demanding that you to interact with your kids. Here are some ideas for your consideration, the next time she calls. Let her hear you say to one of your kids “Just put a tourniquet on it, and let me know when you feel like you’re about to black out.” Or, while speaking to her on the phone, you can yell out to one of your children, “Find the fire extinguisher before the flames reach the living room and my new couches”. And this might encourage her to tell you to tend to your kids if you say, “Those are just two little holes in your skin so don’t worry about it. And I warned you that rattlesnakes can be moody.” But the best way to insure that she doesn’t get off the phone while you deal with your children, is for her to hear you say to one of them, “Don’t wave that .357 Magnum around threatening to shoot my best friend if she hangs up on me!” Not only will she not hang up, she’ll probably put you on hold as she dials 9-11. I hope this helps.

Blake

Blake's Advice Column

• June 8, 2019


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