Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Charlotte, North Carolina – A bat caused quite a scene when it was discovered on a Spirit Airlines flight. According to a Spirit Airlines spokesperson, the stowaway mammal was discovered about 30 minutes into a flight from Charlotte, N.C., to Newark, N.J. “It is believed the bat started its journey in Charlotte, flying into an overhead bin while our crews were doing overnight maintenance,” read a statement by Spirit. “It flew around the cabin for about 15 minutes, frightening all of the passengers. Eventually it landed on one of the first class seats, changed into Dracula, and then ordered a Bloody Mary.”

• August 6, 2019


Previous Post

Next Post

Leave a Reply

Or