Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

I have a friend of mine that’s currently in the hospital. It’s his own fault for trying this new soft drink, even though I repeatedly warned him against it because the brand name had me concerned. He ignored my advice, drank it anyway, and now he’s bedridden in a clinic. I don’t want to sound insensitive, but it serves him right for drinking a soda called “Coke E. coli”.

Life through Blake's eyes

• October 5, 2019


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