Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Jiangsu, China – A man bizarrely swallowed two live 20 inch eels in a bid to “cure his constipation”. The unnamed man from Nanjing, China was rushed to hospital with severe abdominal pain where horrified docs rushed him into surgery to have the eels removed – one of which was still ALIVE and had chewed through his intestine. He was admitted to Jiangsu Provincial Hospital of Traditional Chinese Medicine just one day after he tried the do-it-yourself approach, and was complaining of intense abdominal pain. He told the doctors that he realized they were electric eels, because every time he touched his cell phone, it immediately became fully charged.

• January 17, 2020


Previous Post

Next Post

Leave a Reply

Or