Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

When I was married, I never got along with my mother-in-law. My wife at that time demanded that I take her shopping and buy her a gift, with the hopes that could end the ongoing animosity. I thought about it and I took her up on her suggestion. I know mother-in-law liked jewelry so I took her to a high end jewelry store. She was dazzle by all of the sparkling gems, and she was moved to tears. She then asked me if there was anything any particular that I wanted to buy her. And I answered, “I would like to see you wearing while we’re having dinner later tonight, a necklace made out of magnets that are strong enough to attract steak knives.” Fortunately I ducked when she tried to punch me in the face. I guess she wasn’t hungry.

Life through Blake's eyes

• February 2, 2020


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