Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

Due to the food shortages, I have been buying whatever is available in stores and have been eating some strange combinations. A couple of days ago I ate some sardines covered with whipped cream, yesterday I ate strawberries on spam. And it amazes me at how many things around my home is edible. Yesterday I ate some speaker wire, the tongues of all my shoes, and a remote control. Right now I’m chopping up my big screen tv into manageable portions, and refrigerating it after placing it in sandwich bags. I regret not buying more seasoning.

Life through Blake's eyes

• March 22, 2020


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