Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Nation of Islam leader Louis Farrakhan reluctantly accepts his award from GQ Magazine for…

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BREAKING NEWS – Charlotte, North Carolina – Bank of America’s reputation of being ruthless and insensitive continues to grow. CEO…

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BREAKING NEWS – San Francisco, California – Harold Camping of Family Radio Worldwide has now stated that he will never…

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BREAKING NEWS – New York, City New York – The World Health Organization has concluded that the United States is…

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BREAKING NEWS – Fremont, California – A recent secret meeting has now been made public between solar panel company Solyndra…

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BREAKING NEWS – Rome, Italy – Claudio Barbato of the FLI party got into a fight with Fabio Ranieri from…

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BREAKING NEWS – Pebble Beach, California – Gael Monfils of France is photographed returning a ball during the U.S. Open. He…

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BREAKING NEWS – Kabul, Afghanistan – President Hamid Karzai of Afghanistan tells the press that if a fight starts between…

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BREAKING NEWS – Los Gatos, California – Netflix stock plummeted by 36% after more than 800,000 subscribers left in the…

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BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Occupy Wall Street protestors invade Chase Bank, denouncing the government’s $94.7…

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BREAKING NEWS – Sirte, Libya – Supporters of Muammar Qaddafi state that the former leader preferred to go to trial…

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BREAKING NEWS – New York, City, New York – While on Meet the Press, Congressman Ron Paul states that if…

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BREAKING NEWS – London, England – WikiLeaks CEO Julian Assange, states that they will temporarily stop spilling secrets, and focus…

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BREAKING NEWS – La Cumbre, Bolivia – Bolivian protestors are seen going on a 242 mile march to the country’s…

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BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Attorneys for Quaker Oats appeared in court today seeking monitary damages from former Libyan leader Muammar…

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BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Newt Gingrich was speechless and Mayor Michael Bloomberg stared into the sky, as they…

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BREAKING NEWS – Sirte, Libya – The Libyan government now state that Muammar Qaddafi who was ultimately caught hiding in…

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BREAKING NEWS – Minneapolis, Minnesota – Linus Van Pelt files a lawsuit against a nightclub alleging that he was discriminated…

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BREAKING NEWS – Los Angeles, California – Lindsay Lohan is lead away in handcuffs after her probation was revoked by…

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BREAKING NEWS – Kabul, Afghanistan – While holding a press conference in Afghanistan, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton tries to poke…

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