Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

A female friend has been jogging daily in attempt to shed some pounds, specifically from her butt. In the past…

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On your mark, get ready…

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – San Francisco, California – A super PAC formed to support Sen. Cory Booker’s presidential campaign announced that…

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BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Hollywood, California – Elizabeth Banks suggested that the reason her “Charlie’s Angels” reboot failed to make a…

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BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg’s entry into the 2020…

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BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Des Moines, Iowa – A recent Quinnipiac University poll shows nationwide support for Elizabeth Warren’s presidential candidacy…

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BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – The Associated Press was lampooned by critics on Wednesday after sharing…

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BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Assemblywoman Mathylde Frontus (D-Brooklyn) tried to land $100,000 for the Southern…

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BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – London, England – Prince Andrew was ordered to move his private offices out of Buckingham Palace in…

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BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – With their crisp white shirts, pressed trousers, and proper collar brass,…

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BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Former President Barack Obama once warned he would intervene to stop Sen. Bernie Sanders,…

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THANKSGIVING EVE

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Collegeville, Pennsylvania – Bill Cosby maintained his innocence while speaking out from behind bars for the first…

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BREAKING NEWS – Scottsdale, Arizona – For many, Santa Claus will always be a jolly, white-bearded gentleman who wears red…

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BREAKING NEWS – Miami, Florida – A Florida man who was attacked by an intruder on Saturday fought back, and…

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THANKSGIVING FROM THE DISTANT PAST

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Omaha, Nebraska – A federal judge has ordered Union Pacific to reinstate an engineer who defecated on…

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BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Atlanta, Georgia – Last Thursday, Sen. Elizabeth Warren, D-Mass., told a school choice activist in Atlanta that…

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