Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Politicians seeking to confiscate guns from Americans shouldn’t share their plans…

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BREAKING NEWS – El Paso, Texas – Former Texas Democrat congressman Beto O’Rourke announced Friday he is withdrawing from the…

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BREAKING NEWS – Los Angeles, California – Democratic presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke said religious institutions should be stripped of their…

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BREAKING NEWS – Denver, Colorado – A Colorado woman confronted Democratic presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke on his controversial proposal to…

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BREAKING NEWS – El Paso, Texas – Presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke said living close to your place of work should…

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BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – In the last fundraising quarter, nearly half of the Democratic presidential candidates spent more…

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BREAKING NEWS – Miami, Florida – Presidential hopeful Beto O’ Rourke sidestepped a question about tax rates on wealthy Americans…

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BREAKING NEWS – Las Vegas, Nevada – Casinos all over Sin City are now accepting wagers on what will happen…

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BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – A new rule adopted by the Democratic National Committee and NBC News will evenly…

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BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – When Sasha Watson hears presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke speak, or reads about him online,…

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BREAKING NEWS – Los Angeles, California – Thousands of illegal immigrants are planning to march in twelve states on May…

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BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Democratic presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke sounded the alarms, saying that civilization…

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BREAKING NEWS – Nashua, New Hampshire – While former Texas Congressman and Democratic presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke made his second…

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BREAKING NEWS – Berlin, Germany – Former president Barack Obama touched on growing divisions within his own party, warning against…

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BREAKING NEWS – El Paso, Texas – Beto O’Rourke didn’t eat crow, humble pie or even his words after losing…

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BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Beto O’Rourke’s Vanity Fair profile mocked for stories about ex-girlfriends, bookshelves…

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BREAKING NEWS – Mount Pleasant, Iowa – While campaigning in Central Park Coffee Company, former congressman and 2020 presidential candidate…

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BREAKING NEWS – El Paso, Texas – We’re doomed! Beto O’Rourke starts presidential campaign by claiming the world faces ‘catastrophe’…

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BREAKING NEWS – Houston, Texas – Former Rep. Beto O’Rourke (D-Texas) said in a new interview that President Trump’s proposed…

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