Michigan-advisers-try-to-calm-clients-in-wake-of-Detroit’s-bankruptcy-filing

BREAKING NEWS – Detroit, Michigan – Due to Detroit’s recent bankruptcy and deplorable financial situation, they are currently unable to buy paper for birth certificates or death certificates. Mayor Dave Bing has created a temporary solution by making it illegal for the next 90 days for anyone to be born or to die. To ensure that the new law is strictly enforced, he has hired additional policeman to monitor all hospital nurseries and funeral homes.

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