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BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – With Joe Biden on the horizon poised to enter the presidential race, Hillary Clinton warns her supporters not to donate any money to his campaign. In a secretly leaked email she firmly stated, “If I get the nomination and ultimately win the general election and I discover that some of you gave money to Biden, I will triple my normal fee to pass laws on your behalf. Also, I will quadruple the fee for leaders of nations that have frequently purchased my influence regarding foreign policies.”

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