BREAKING NEWS – Philadelphia, Pennsylvania – Congressman Bob Brady steals Pope Francis’ I glass after White House address to sip remaining liquid with his wife – and then saves some to sprinkle on his grandchildren. After being informed of what happened, Pope Francis I said during mass in his heavy accent, “What Congressman Brady did was flattering and a little unusual, but to be on the safe side, I plan on seeking a restraining order against that weirdo.”

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