Dear Blake,

I’m 25, and have been involved with the same guy for two years. So imagine the unpleasant situation when a strange woman I’d never heard of began circling my boyfriend’s house, beating on the doors, and calling his phone. He refused to let her in and told me that she was someone he was involved with about a year before he met me… and, she is 30 years older than he is (he’s 29). I have mass amounts of hatred for this woman after she chased me and I had to call the cops. So this might seem silly, but I wonder if he’ll ever get over her. Sometimes I see him stare at cars that are exactly like hers, or he gets tense when he hears her name. Is this just me being insecure? Or do you think my boyfriend will always be in love with this woman?

Signed, Vanessa

From Louisville, Kentucky

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Dear Vanessa,

Ex-lovers can often create problems for their ex-lover. And an ex-lover that’s also a cougar, is comparable to a serial killer… with excessive make-up. If your boyfriend hasn’t sought to get a restraining order from that menopausal monster, it’s possible that he’s enjoying the attention from that old bat. You said that she chased you. If it was on foot and you couldn’t elude her, maybe your boyfriend stayed with her due to her impressive physical stamina. On the other hand, you might be in such poor physical shape, that he’s confident he’ll easily outlive you, so he can finally find happiness elsewhere. Even though his emotional response to her name is either because he misses her or fears her, as in most guys his age, as long as his hormones are stimulated, the source causing the squeamish reaction is irrelevant. Unfortunately, love struck cougars have a well deserved reputation for becoming very violent toward the object of their affection when they feel they are being rejected. If it ever comes to that, be sure and tell her exactly what you think of her as she’s being lead away in handcuffs… while your boyfriend is being placed in a body bag. I hope this helps.


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