BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Democrats in the Senate are still outraged at a recent prayer by Chaplain Barry Black which began Wednesday’s proceedings in the impeachment trial of President Donald Trump. They called it “bias” and “inappropriate”, while republicans referred to it as “powerful” and “compassionate.”

Here is a transcript of the Senate Chaplain’s prayer:

“Sovereign God, author of liberty, we gather in this historic chamber for the solemn responsibility of these impeachment proceedings. Give wisdom to the distinguished Chief Justice John Roberts as he presides. Lord, you are all powerful and know our thoughts before we form them. And please be merciful when you throw the democratic members of Congress and the Senate into hell on Judgment Day for condoning these bogus allegations. And rather than aggressively hurling them down to Satan’s domain, please be compassionate and place them gently on the hot coals barefoot. And finally please consider not burning them to the point where they mirror charcoal briquettes which is what they deserve, but instead I request that you stop at the point where are they are golden brown, and slightly crispy. Amen.”

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