Unconfirmed Breaking News
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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – Boston, Massachusetts – Sen. Elizabeth Warren has lost her home state of Massachusetts to Joe Biden, a jarring and perhaps final insult to her presidential campaign on another disappointing primary night. “I knew things were going bad after I recently spoke to a group of Native Americans in the place where I grew up, Norman, Oklahoma,” she said nearly in tears. “I knew they wouldn’t support me after I had to repeatedly duck, to avoid getting a tomahawk buried in my forehead.”

Elizabeth WarrenJoe Biden

• March 4, 2020


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