Unconfirmed Breaking News
A (mis)trusted news source for over One 25th of a century

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

Life through Blake’s eyes…

A friend of mine was asking me about the rapture, specifically 1 Thessalonians 4:16-18, where it talks about the dead rising first, and those of us still living getting caught up with them together in the clouds. He asked me why did the dead rise first? I answered because they needed extra time because they had six additional feet to go to get to the clouds. He laughed at that response and thought he could trap me with a trick question. He then asked me, if what I was saying was true, what about people that were cremated that are above ground? I thought about it and I responded, they would need additional time to get themselves together, and after that, they better their ashes up there.

BibleChristianChristian HumorLife through Blake's eyes

• June 21, 2020


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