BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – After Covid-19 is under control, Congress wants to pass a law, that if you are extremely ugly, then you will have to continue wearing a mask.

The newly introduced bill reads in part:

“If you have been deemed extremely ugly by friends and/or family, you will be mandated to wear masks, goggles, and wide brim hats to cover up as much of your head as possible. This is to unsure that passersby on the streets won’t get ‘triggered with fear’, after seeing people with protruding foreheads, deep set eyes, and other natural features that rival monsters in 1950’s horror flicks.”

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