BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Army Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl, who was captured in 2009 and recently released, is now in the care of the U.S. military in Germany, and is being evaluated and treated before returning home. After recent information surfaced that he was a deserter and a possible collaborator, a growing amount of veterans and soldiers are demanding that he should face a military trial. Bergdahl responded by saying that, “I would not call myself a deserter, but I was exercising my right to make a career move by quitting my job, especially since I feel I was divinely inspired by Allah. I also believe that I am owed at least one year of unemployment after I walked away from my post.”