BREAKING NEWS – Yorktown Heights, New York – IBM has enhanced its Watson supercomputer, famous for its appearance on the quiz show “Jeopardy,” in an attempt to speed up the pace of scientific breakthroughs. This week IBM unveiled its Watson Discovery Advisor, which understands the sophisticated language of science, such as how chemical compounds interact, and is being touted as a way for scientists to accelerate their research and development. The most recent discovery according to John Gordon, vice president of IBM’s Watson Group, is that their supercomputer has concluded that humans have become more progressively stupid at an accelerated pace. After analyzing all of the historic data, it also concluded that the human intellect maxed out in the late in the late 1990’s and it’s been downhill ever since, referring to it as “reverse evolution”.