BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – The drug Daraprim, acquired in August by Turing Pharmaceuticals, a start-up run by a former hedge fund manager Martin Shkreli, immediately raised the price to $750 a tablet from $13.50, bringing the annual cost of treatment for some patients to hundreds of thousands of dollars. The 32 year old CEO explained that he understood that a lot of people on fixed incomes needed the drug to live, but he also he needed to “party and live it up and the price hike should cover my present and future pleasures”. Acknowledging that his business practice is currently being investigated Congress, Shkreli said with a slight smile, “There is an election next year and a lot of politicians will need donations. I’m a businessman and I know exactly how to deal with those saps.”