Dear Blake,
My husband works full-time, and when he gets home, and also on weekends, he’s “exhausted” and needs to relax. He’s in bed by 8 every night, and on the weekends, if we don’t have something planned, he lies in bed all day napping and watching TV. However, when he realizes he has a weekend day free (meaning I’m taking our 6-year-old daughter someplace he doesn’t need to be), he all of a sudden “finds” the energy to make golf plans, go on outings with friends, etc. If I make plans to hire a baby sitter and it’s just us going out, he has the energy and looks forward to it. It’s as if he is happiest when he doesn’t have to be with our child. I’m tired of asking him to make plans with her or spend time with her. I feel like a nag for something I feel he should want to do. Any advice?
Signed, Ann
From Concord, New Hampshire
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Dear Ann,
I’m sorry that your husband is not giving your daughter the kind of quality time you feel she deserves. Hopefully, this relationship issue can be resolved before your daughter becomes a teenager, and embraces the mindset to destroy any unfortunate male that offends her. Maybe your husband never wanted kids and he’s subconsciously showing his regrets for knocking you up. Does your daughter look or appear to be exceedingly wicked? Watch the movies “Rosemary’s Baby” and “The Bad Seed”, because your husband might be viewing your child through that lens. It’s also possible that he is so disgusted with you, that being around her might be such a nauseating experience that emotionally he can’t handle it. But my biggest concern for his behavior in regards to your little one is, she is not biologically his. And the only time he smiles when he thinks of her, is he might have a strong legal argument that he shouldn’t have to pay child support, after his lawyer humiliates you in divorce court. I hope this helps.
Blake