Dear Blake,
I’m so tired of dating! I’ve been single a long time—most of my twenties. But the thing I’m most tired of is ghosting. Why do guys suddenly cease all communication? For the love of God! Be a man! Just tell me what’s wrong with me! Why don’t you want to go out with me again? What did I say? What did I do? I just want to know so I can be better for next time. Please advise.
Signed, Jenny
From New York City, New York
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Dear Jenny,
There can be a variety of reason why men abruptly refrain from communicating with you. And since I don’t personally know you or them, I have to speculate on what about you makes their flesh crawl. You say you live in New York City. If you were born and raised there and you’re dating men who grew up in other states, maybe that can’t adjust to how loud you are, and how often you use profanity for no apparent reason. Could it be the way you dress? Are you clothes so nice that your past boyfriends have overwhelming feelings of inadequacy, or are your clothes so raggedy that their friends genuinely believe that you are homeless? Do you often have dramatic mood swings, like at one minute you’re making him a gourmet romantic dinner, and the next minute you want to pour some hot cooking grease down his shorts? However, I have to applaud you for seeking answers to relationship questions that are important to you. But keep in mind, most men have concluded that inquisitive women like yourself are intensely desperate and extremely stupid. I hope this helps.
Blake