BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – The ACLU files a lawsuit against the reindeer trainers for discriminating against Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. According to the courts papers, they have witnesses that will testify that not only was he not allowed to join in with others and play reindeer games, but nothing was done when his peers would laugh at him and call him names, which clearly constitutes as bullying. At a press conference, Rudolph stated, “This issue was resolved a long time ago, so I wish those morons at the ACLU would get a life!”