BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – The ACLU announces that they will soon be lobbying to get a law passed that will allow homeowners to be sued, if a burglar is attacked by a family dog as they break into a home. This potential legal option for alleged thieves will only apply if signs are not clearly posted that a canine is on the premises, and the civil rights group emphasized that under no circumstances is property more valuable than a human life. They also want it to be made illegal for people to post signs that they have a dog when they do not, because it unfairly denies would be thieves an opportunity to perfect their craft.