BREAKING NEWS – Sacramento, California – Despite cost overruns, lawsuits, public opposition and a projected completion date 13 years behind schedule, California Gov. Jerry Brown broke ground Tuesday on what is to become the most expensive public works project in U.S. history: the California bullet train. Brown acknowledged what many people suspected, that his primary motive for building the train is because San Francisco is a sanctuary city. He stated at a press conference, “that with a train that travels at 200 mph, we can get illegal aliens out of Los Angeles so fast, that by the time the feds have processed the paperwork to deport someone, we would already have them transported and hidden in northern California.”