BREAKING NEWS – Palo Alto, California – Because of the recent ruling by the U.S. Supreme Court, sometime in early spring, the creator of Facebook Mark Zuckerberg is banning all misleading profile pictures. This includes but not limited to:
1. Intentionally posting older pictures when the member looked better.
2. Hair that has been dyed.
3. Pictures that have been professionally airbrushed.
4. Out of focus pictures to masquerade wrinkles.
5. Excessive amount of make-up.
6. Pictures taken with very unattractive people, just to make the member look more appealing.
Facebook will only be allowing profile pictures to be posted, if they were taken of the member within five minutes after they first wake up. A spokesman for FB stated that they are enforcing this new rule, because thousands of people have been hospitalized with sudden massive heart attacks, after finally meeting a person that posted a misleading picture on their profile, and being shocked by their actual appearance. The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that FB may be liable for the medical costs as well as punitive damages.