BREAKING NEWS – St. Louis, Missouri – Bud Light has reportedly informed wholesalers it would buy back unsold beer once it expires as the company continues to face backlash from its polarizing pact with transgender influencer Dylan Mulvaney.
The Wall Street Journal published a lengthy feature on the company’s struggles after conservatives across America have ditched Bud Light over the saga that began in March when Mulvaney publicized that the beer company sent packs of Bud Light featuring the influencer’s face as a way to celebrate a full year of “girlhood.” Backlash was swift, and the promotion is now considered one of the most polarizing in the history of the digital space.
“We think we know how to offset this,” said a Bud Light executive in a leaked memo. “For every conservative drinker that we lost, let’s replace him or her with a transgender. All we have to do now, is compile a list of cities and states all over America, that has a very high concentration of weirdos.”