Dear Blake,
I am a 60-year-old male who is educated, successful, healthy and in good physical condition. I have been divorced a long time, and although I have a normal dating life, I haven’t been in a relationship for a couple of years.
I have been blessed with wonderful friends. The issue is, they are all married, and I find I am no longer invited to events, outings and get-togethers like I was when I had a partner. I know my friends enjoy my company, but when they make plans, they think only about inviting other couples.
It hurts when I hear my friend say he and his wife went to the ballgame with So-and-So and his wife, to a flea market — or anywhere. It’s making my life lonely. I have dropped hints, to no avail. Do I need to find another partner to be invited out with my friends?
Signed, Marcus
From Elko, Nevada
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Dear Marcus,
I think it’s awful the way your “friends” are snubbing you. Getting another partner is a good idea, but a better idea is to ruin all the outings that you’re not invited to. Here are some suggestions. Anonymously call the restaurant that they plan dine, and warn them that your so called friends are coming, and they have the reputation of running out without paying, so serve them at their own risk. If they are attending a concert, make a call to the box office, informing them that they plan on taking videos of the concert and sell them on the black market. If they all meet at someone’s house, call the police and allege they are cooking some crystal meth to keep up with the demands from students at a local grammar school, plus the teachers. If worst comes to worst, confront the couples and pour your heart out and explain how you feel. If they apologize, gracefully accept it. If they aren’t receptive, allege that one of the wives recently gave you an STD. Once you say that, they probably won’t ever invite you to another social function, but they probably won’t invite each other either. I hope this helps.
Blake