Dear Blake,
I have two grandkids — a 4-year-old granddaughter, “Emily,” and a 2-year-old grandson, “Earl.” My husband is not blood-related to them. He treats Emily like a princess, but treats Earl badly. She can do no wrong; he can do no right. Anytime I have them both over, my husband and I have huge fights because of how he disciplines and ignores my grandson. He doesn’t show Earl any of the love he shows my granddaughter. I have tried talking to him about it, and he says, “Why can’t you get it through your head? I don’t like boys.” When I told him it hurts me, he just rolled his eyes. I see my options as not having my grandson over or ending my marriage. I’m now very resentful. What should I do?
Signed, Sheila
From Billings, Montana
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Dear Sheila,
The way your husband is behaving is hurtful on multiple levels. The only thing I can suggest is for Earl to fight back… by being ten times more malicious than his tormentor. Here are some things I think Earl should say to his grandfather. “When you go to hell, who do you want as roommate, a serial killer or Hitler?” You can even chime in by saying to Earl in front of your husband, “Which ever one he chooses, they’ll try to break the lease and move out.” Or, have Earl say, “Is stupidity a genetic thing, because if it is, I’m glad I’m not related to you.” Or maybe these words. “I hope you get cremated when you die, so I can put your ashes in a crack pipe.” But if you really want to rattle him, recruit Emily and have her say the following. “Hey you older geezer, the way you stare at me makes me really uncomfortable, and prisons are full of men that started off like that.” He then won’t be able to stand either one of them, but at least his animosity will be equal toward Earl and Emily, and the playing field will finally be level. I hope this helps.
Blake