Dear Blake,
I have mounting personal problems and I never know what to do. Can I come see you, because I need someone I can talk to.
Signed, Lindsay Lohan
from Los Angeles, California
* * * * * * * *
Dear Lindsay,
Don’t come to me, I’ll come to you. The thought of you behind the wheel of car is terrifying! Besides, if I suggested that you drive, I may be liable for the amount of damage you’ll undoubtedly cause, and I would be indirectly responsible for unleashing you on the public. I hope this helps.
Blake